Pieces of the Puzzle

This happened a year ago when blogging and bloggers intrigued me no end. We didn’t have the modern day ‘Blog-meets’ and hence couldn’t happily land into a yahoo site with pictures attached to names. When bloggers blogged anonymously, they felt the dire need to remain so. And I remained eternally curious.

Sometimes, by extraordinary luck and great penance, I would get to know the real name of a blogger and the first thing I would do is Google them. I have an inconceivable faith in the powers of google . Hopefully I can dig up some dirt on the victim and most of the times I am rewarded. A hazy link that takes you to a support group website where our protagonist has asked some techie question is enough to make my day. So you can imagine my shock on searching for our very own Patrix (real name withheld to protect the identity of Pratik) on Google and actually coming up with links filled with explicit information. Wonder of wonders, there was a not-so-flattering photo too!!!

So he went to IIT Bombay, eh? That explains his posts which resemble the Baron’s guide. Reading more about Pratik had my jaws drop to the floor and my eyeballs pop to the screen (yeah, like Tom in Tom and Jerry). This is NOT what I had imagined! Jeez! Holy Guacamole! Wowiee Powiee! I immediately called Starfest, my partner in crime, to discuss this in an excited frenzy, totally flabbergasted at the find.

Tinda? Bhai? Laundiyabaaji and bakarchodi?? Shocking indeed! Here, apna hallowed Patrix was trying to portray a pristine image and just look at him!! In real life, he is such an ..er.. interesting guy! Man! ‘There is only so much you can lie about yourself. People are bound to find out’, we sympathized with Patrix, patting our backs in glee.

In his college dairy, Mr. Paramveer Singh obligingly points out – ‘M**** in nothing else but a towel, with original intentions of going to the toilet, now running down the corridor.
reason:
shivalites with burning mashaals yelling like african natives chasing him down the myriad dark corridors.’

Another source, Mr. Vipul Kansal, says,’ jab mumbai ka king kong pratik m**** daaru peeta hai tab woh saari junta ke manoranjan ke liye nude belly dance karta hai.’

Now that’s an image that will not leave my mind that easily. Though it was all scandalous and eye opening, we found it highly amusing. I would trip on carpets and choke on food controlling my laughter. Star and I promptly started using references to the site, trying to taunt Patrix out of his wits. Calling him Gattu, Tinda, Laughing Buddha etc in comment boxes, hoping that he would get embarrassed and fall at our feet in agony, promising us riches if we stopped harassing him! Imagine our further confusion and rage when he hardly responded to these gestures and when he did, he appeared clueless . We regretfully concluded that he either was too ashamed to admit this or he had a bad bout of amnesia. We sent the link to all the people we knew and did some image damage, ‘Go and get the real scoop about Patrix, the wannabe nerd!!!’ *evil maniacal laff* Folks who didn't even know the story started alluding to the Tinda. It became an out-of-control fashion statement and was being used totally out of context. *sigh*

Then one unsuspecting day, it came as a shock really. It occurred to me that Patrix never even saw the insides of an IIT, bah (courtesy: one of his posts). He went to some obscure Architecture college in Bombay. He was really clueless about THE Tinda. This was in fact a different Pratik with the same freakin last name!  How many of those do we come across living in Atlanta, I say?! Google, how could you do this to me? Er..now what!? The damage was done… Tinda became a household name and poor Patrix had nothing to do with it!

It was time to find a nice hiding spot.