The Ancestral Curse
Scene I
Baldy and girl friend, who is also bald, are eloping. Their love story is irrelevant. What’s more crucial is that the girl friend is pregnant – with Baldy’s kids. They have to marry before society starts pointing feathers at them. They reach the Garuda temple, panting and puffing and tie the knot.
Ecstatic and anxious, they now want to settle down somewhere far from flocking relatives. They reach the vast plains near Peoria, Illinois. Beautiful country side, not a soul in site. Baldy finds a lovely spot for their abode, an overhang from a tall cliff. Mrs. Baldy is not too pleased. She says she might get vertigo, especially now that she is expectant. "Don’t be silly, darling", says Baldy, "You are an eagle!!" Saying thus, Baldy spreads his mighty wings and soars to the top of the cliff. His bride follows him. They build a nest, lay eggs, hatch them, hunt for rats (in that precise order).
They live in marital bliss.
Scene II
Corporate setting. In a conference room, five human beings are huddled over long drawing sheets. Indignant Environmentalist, Smug Environmentalist Chela, Irritated Client, Exasperated Boss & Shocked me.
There was no other way. Now the road alignment will have to take a deviation and these plans will have to change. Geometry, profile, cross-sections.. everything! 2 months of hard work.. gone!
Me (stifling a sob): What?? But Why??
Boss: Because we have impacted someone’s property. We are within one mile radius.
Me: Whose? Hugh Hefner’s?
Envo: No! Baldy’s.
Chela: Yes miss.. Baldy and family just moved in.
Envo: (with authority) According to Bald Eagle Protection Act of 1940, you cannot build anything within 1 mile radius of the birds nest. You could get sued.
Chela: Yes Yes!
Me: (shit shocked) What in the name of holy Tarzan?!! We are talking of one eagle here, not a colony of them right? Why cant we give Baldy some kind of relocation package, a huge compensation, truckload of worms?? Are eagles sensitive to this? I mean, he wont even know the road is coming up from his perch.
Boss:(cough) Ahem.. Eagles have good vision.
Envo: Anyway, since mankind *pauses and looks vehemently at us* almost succeeded in making the bald eagle population almost extinct, we cannot let such atrocious acts take place. Do you know that population of the bald eagle was 417 in all the 48 states put together in 1963.
Chela: In 1963 ..imagine that!
Client
: (Worried) Oh no! No sue woo! You guys- you consultants! Do the necessary changes. We need this in a month OK.Boss: Sure sure Mr. IC! We’ll take care of it. No problem. Eagles have rights, especially the bald ones. American symbol and all. Alpha and team will work on changing the geometry etc., don’t worry. And um er.. supplementary costs?
Scene III
One week later, in Baldy’s nest. Mrs. Baldy, plucking her feathers looks coyly at her husband, "Kids are getting bigger & balder, I think we should move soon, dear."
"Sure sexy, in 3 weeks."
This is based on a true story. Alpha is working hard unaware of Baldy’s devious plans.
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| alpha September 23, 2003 10:26 AM PDT  Yeah Zap! Made to bounce all the time. Kushee..thanks for dropping by and leaving all those nice comments. | ||
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| Khushee September 22, 2003 07:00 PM PDT Lol. That was a good read! Good going! | ||
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| Zap September 22, 2003 01:36 PM PDT Hahahahahahahaa:) We are all the Stars' Tennis balls. There is no logic. | ||
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| alpha September 19, 2003 04:19 PM PDT Wish u had left your whereabouts Mr.Been there. Yeah, Fishes need to mate. Anyways, they do their job and we ours. Its fine to compromise once in a while. Last time it was butterflies...that's a funny story too. Hmm *flowing thoughts*..Mr.& Mrs. Butt... | ||
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| been there September 19, 2003 04:13 PM PDT Nice one! Same story everywhere when you deal with the DOT! One of our project, which is being built..earlier this year the contractor pleaded to continue with small schedule changes. But they did let him do it..ask why... Its time for the fish to mate! So no changes to streams, encroachments etc! | ||
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| alpha September 19, 2003 01:30 PM PDT Me is glad I cud make u all laugh at my misery. Nah! I am getting paid...Overtime! Yeah Elaichi..Baldy makes me redo everything in that area. | ||
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| elaichi chai September 19, 2003 01:25 PM PDT omigod ..hahhaha ....that was funni as hell ..... ur really reworking everything for this ???? .... | ||
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| khotta September 19, 2003 12:42 PM PDT if u r unawares thn who wrote this story??? n havnt u read it??? hmm kahanni mein twist hai | ||
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| wandy September 19, 2003 10:13 AM PDT LOL...another LOL...good one!! I am actually glad I know you (sorta!!) ~ you manage to put a smile on my face more often that you'll know...I will be grinning about this story today...Sorry about the change of plans though...part of whole deal though...I guess!! take care!! | ||
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| JillOfAllTrades September 19, 2003 09:09 AM PDT WHAT A RIOT, ALPHA!!! U r funny!!! | ||
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| alpha September 19, 2003 08:04 AM PDT Richa: Mah Money comes from designing and redesigning. Stories keep me from feeling depressed. Therapy! Amit: Sequel will be quite violent. Are u sure you can handle it? Heretic: Of course the Eagle is more American that me..saala! Anyways, me is doing what needs to be done. :( | ||
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| alpha September 19, 2003 08:00 AM PDT Pompy: Scene II happened...sorta. The other scenes were what I think happened/will happen. Well the bottom line is I'm screwed! Ankh: Thanks for coming. And yeah, in India I wud've hired Salmaan Khan to do the needy..*wicked nod* | ||
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| alpha September 19, 2003 07:56 AM PDT Sir N, I hope you are right. If that silly bird moves again.... EXTINCT shall be written all over its bald head! (looks around *sheepish smile* just kidding people!! eheh) | ||
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| Heretic September 19, 2003 07:29 AM PDT U r in the wrong profession! And hey, I resent your resentment at Baldy's house... he's more american than you! Change the geometry--and charge the client--cuss me--and then smile... Love you, as always! | ||
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| AmitL September 19, 2003 06:17 AM PDT Alpha,neato.That was a real laff riot.Wonder if lil Baldies get separated later,and meet again at a mela? Sequel,part II coming up. | ||
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| richa September 19, 2003 05:42 AM PDT amazing way to tell a story...you shuld write for money... charge these boys..... | ||
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| Ankh September 19, 2003 04:30 AM PDT Wow! They sure value their natural resources. Out here, they would've put up a sign which would read "Baldy Point" and charged extra money for the nazaara. | ||
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| Morphicus September 19, 2003 03:17 AM PDT Baldy indeed!! LOL | ||
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| pompy September 19, 2003 12:08 AM PDT that was so imaginative babe :p had me in splits.... but this really happened??? :o | ||
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| Nobody September 18, 2003 11:46 PM PDT I'm sorry, but I'm laughing when you're probably crying...hahaha...that was quite a riot Alpha!!! P.S. Don't eagles sit tight for a pretty long time once they set up home? | ||
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| alpha September 18, 2003 05:05 PM PDT Thanks Yogi! It actually happened..today.*sob* Yeah, you guessed right. | ||
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| Yogustus September 18, 2003 04:58 PM PDT u are such a darling writer!!! man thats some story telling abilities!!! whooosh! great stuff alpha...so are u a civil enggi??? | ||
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